Quick answer: Use this guide to decide what to do next, what to ask your servicer, and when to involve a free HUD-approved housing counselor. If you are already behind or have a sale date, act today.
Answer six private questions about your payment, income, missed payments, loan type, equity, and urgency. Your score runs in your browser and does not ask for a phone number.
Check my free score →Start with your payment pressure
When a mortgage feels unaffordable, the first step is not choosing a program. The first step is knowing the size of the problem. A household that is short for one month needs a different plan from a household whose payment is permanently too high.
Write down the real numbers: monthly mortgage payment, escrow, HOA, utilities, minimum debt payments, income after the recent change, and the exact amount you are short. Then identify whether the problem is temporary or long-term.
- Temporary hardship: job interruption, medical bill, short-term income gap, repair, or delayed payment.
- Long-term affordability problem: payment permanently above income, escrow jump, ARM reset, income reduction, or debts that cannot be reduced quickly.
This distinction matters because temporary hardship may fit forbearance or repayment. Long-term unaffordability may require modification, refinance, sale, renting a room, or a more structural plan.
Options before you miss a payment
If you are still current, you are in the strongest position. Do not wait until the due date passes to ask questions.
1. Call the servicer before the missed payment
Ask what hardship options are available if you are at risk of missing a payment. Some servicers can discuss forbearance, repayment plans, modification review, or other options before the account becomes more delinquent.
2. Review refinance only if you still qualify
Refinance may help when your credit, income, equity, and interest rate environment make sense. But refinance is not always realistic after missed payments, low equity, or reduced income. Do not assume refinance is the answer until you compare the cost and eligibility.
3. Reduce the shortage, not just the stress
List payments that can be paused or negotiated: subscriptions, unsecured debt hardship plans, insurance shopping, unused vehicles, and discretionary costs. The goal is to find a monthly number that can keep the mortgage current while you pursue a longer-term fix.
4. Speak with a HUD-approved housing counselor
A counselor can help you prepare a budget, understand servicer options, and avoid scams. They are especially useful if you feel overwhelmed or you do not understand the paperwork.
Options if you are already behind
If you have already missed one or more payments, ask for “loss mitigation.” This is the general term for options that may help a borrower avoid foreclosure or resolve delinquency.
- Repayment plan: catch up over several months by adding part of the missed amount to future payments.
- Forbearance: temporary pause or reduction, usually followed by a plan for the missed amount.
- Deferral or partial claim: missed payments may be moved to the end of the loan or handled through a subordinate claim, depending on loan type and investor rules.
- Loan modification: permanent loan change designed to create a more affordable or sustainable payment.
- Sale, short sale, or deed-in-lieu: last-resort options when keeping the home is not realistic.
Compare the paths
| Situation | Possible fit | Question to ask |
|---|---|---|
| One-month income gap | Short-term forbearance or repayment plan | “How will I repay the skipped amount?” |
| Payment permanently too high | Loan modification or refinance if eligible | “Can my payment be reduced or term changed?” |
| FHA loan and hardship | FHA loss-mitigation review | “Which FHA retention options did you evaluate?” |
| Already received legal papers | HUD counselor and possible legal aid | “What deadline applies in my state or court?” |
| Cannot afford the home even after help | Sale, short sale, deed-in-lieu, relocation plan | “What option avoids the worst credit and legal outcome?” |
What to say to your servicer
“I am worried I cannot afford my mortgage payment. I want to avoid falling behind or getting further behind. What loss-mitigation options are available for my loan, and what documents do you need from me?”
Ask for the application link, upload instructions, deadline, and a written list of required documents. After every call, write down the date, time, person you spoke to, and next step.
Red flags: choices that can make it worse
- Using high-interest debt to make a mortgage payment without a plan for next month.
- Ignoring escrow changes or insurance increases that made the payment unaffordable.
- Paying an upfront fee to a “rescue” company.
- Sending documents without confirming they were received.
- Assuming a forbearance means the missed payments disappear.
- Waiting until a foreclosure sale date is close before asking for help.
The right move depends on your loan type, state, timeline, and income. If you are unsure, start with your servicer and a HUD-approved housing counselor. Those two calls can clarify whether the problem is solvable inside the loan or whether you need a broader plan.
FAQ
What should I do first if I can’t afford my mortgage?
Call your mortgage servicer and ask about hardship or loss-mitigation options. If you feel overwhelmed, contact a HUD-approved housing counselor for free foreclosure-prevention counseling.
Is refinance the best option if my payment is too high?
Not always. Refinance depends on income, credit, equity, rates, and whether you are already delinquent. Modification or forbearance may be more realistic for hardship situations.
Should I stop paying my mortgage to qualify for help?
Do not stop paying just to qualify for a program without talking to your servicer or a housing counselor. Missing payments can create fees, credit damage, and foreclosure risk.